Im so tired now and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, to stay or leave? We dont really have many, if any, moments of romance anymore. Please know there is hope, and help is available. If you think youre a piece of poop, youre going to think others think that way too. Also, it is very important that a psychiatrist, and not a general practitioner, be managing her medication. Be willing to provide physical assistance. How do I approach the situation without hurting her feelings/making her feel bad? Psychiatrists are the experts in the medical treatment of depression, and they will be able to provide better care than a general practitioner. Youre so much less experienced and you know so much less than you think, Im not saying that as a criticism at all, Im sure youve been through more than I can imagine, but people have gone through this before and somehow got passed it to live their life for decades and decades. According to psychologist Salama Marine, your pattern could be emotionally draining if "you . I love her, but I cant go on like this, sometimes I want to escape, but I cant. I dunno maybe thats just me. He is also seeing a psychiatrist who has advised he doesnt work I am doing 3 jobs to pay for my divorce as he is going to go bankrupt with his business =- because he couldnt face going in to work except at lunch time. I agreed but this has left me with nothing to do, leaving my friends was a massive mistake! she knows im here for her. Like, a supermodel could walk by and your partner wouldn't bat at an eye. Assistir Sheffield Utd X Tottenham - Ao Vivo Grtis HD sem travar, sem anncios. I feel really lost. Me and my LDR girlfriend were originally together for 7 months, then took a break for 3, and now we are back together. She has been alcoholic for 10 years. You mention that your girlfriends medication does not seem to be helping her. I only have time to look at primary materials and not much more, and sometimes I wait until she has gone to sleep so I can read in peace. Im not sure whats going on but I let her know constructively that I considered leaving her I know its harsh but it was a reality check. It's not fun for either party, and it's definitely a sign that things aren't entirely healthy. I dont know if it is a good thing to avoid that, I am almost sure it isnt. But you're dragging me down, yeah. We started dating and since after 2 months shes been depressed. I have thought about leaving, but I'm afraid it would devastate her, and I truthfully don't know that she would survive it. (Cue that sad trombone. 11 months ago I started dating my girlfriend and everything was amazing. Youve managed to take care of your girlfriend and remain connected enough to yourself to come up with these questions. Posted October 5, 2013 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan Question: Hi Irene, My BFF and I have been friends since high school. I hope you will take another one and find some support for yourself. The medications side effect is sex blocking, also with her off alcohol her mind cant deal with emotions as other people, so basicly we had like 3 times sex this year. There must be fond memories. I am seeking some advice. Seeing the change in her every day life and general well-being has been nothing short of a complete shock to me. Hugs. But I love her and want to help. a) Conversation Medically reviewed by Jennifer Litner, PhD, LMFT, CST By Ash Fisher on June 10, 2021. i feel it but i but i just cant deal with being her friend in school and more outside, i cant do it in school. Whatever the reason may be (unresolved conflicts, lack of trust, etc. I know what it feels like to be distant, but I have extra credit for you because you are near her but yet you still get the cold shoulder. It hurt me deeply and I dont know what to do. girlfriend is dragging me down I feel that my girlfriend is dragging me down and although she's happy in the relationship I'm not. I can know no one would have got solution. It was a no-win situation for me. It almost feels as though she is in a better mood when I am down! We kept going on, and little by little she started becoming more and more away from me. She doesnt like it when I do my own thing or want to go out or have something in my life other than her. hello, I am this depressed girl, I have high blood pressure because of her. The burden on caretakers is significant, and there is great therapeutic value in realizing you are not alone. But she just barely ever wants to talk, but thinks I should be always trying to talk to her even when she wont want too. As Dr. Sylvie Stacy said on Livestrong.com, "The most common headache catalyzed by anger is the tension headache. Software Full Name: Adobe Premiere Pro 2023. We stopped having sex last year because of her trauma. This could mean adding individual and/or group therapy to her treatment regimen, trying a new therapeutic approach, or making a change to her medication. First, if you are ever in crisis or are in danger of hurting yourself or someone else, it is very important you seek help immediately. (You're so tired) But you just can't sleep. She is in a constant state of less sad at the best of times. Next time you feel like this world is messed, go outside and try something new. All efforts made on my part were in vain. Ive never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life. As time went on our texts started to get more and more one sided as i would ask about her day and i would help her with any problems she had, but she would always start complaining about her problems and never actually talking about mine. I strongly encourage you to begin your own therapy. To go cold turkey off 3 different anti depressants can someone die by doing that? After a year of being together i started to talk about how bad our sexlife and that it has changed, her reply was always that im comparing this to things i read on the internet and that what we had before is considered honeymoon period. I always tell her I enjoy how she is my first thought when i wake up and the last. The more. These people are emotionally selfish they may not do it on purpose but they will take away everything that defines you and then you will be a empty shell . I would answer, I just want to feel free and safe. I try not to put pressure on her to be a certain way or accomplish a certain thing in a given day, but when the time comes when there is actually a really important thing she needs to do, and shes not able to do it, i feel i end up hurting her and not helping. Listen, really try to listen like she was your best friend not girlfriend. It was new to me and i didnt know exactly how depressed people behave. And one last thing, she really wants to be again successful, beautiful, smart, witty, and attractive for you more than anything else. Setup Type: Offline Installer / Full Standalone Setup. The GoodTherapy.org Team is not qualified to offer professional advice, but we encourage you to reach out. Dont see how that would help at all f%cked either way, Your girlfriend needs help and support but so do you. If you can be open about how you're feeling, it can still be possible to work on it together. Dry spells happen a lot. Obviously it isnt making her any happier as things are.. Move on with your life. I can not just do sex all the time Im not a robot. When I asked her if she wanted to go get some food, ice cream the mall,she said no for so many reasons. Sam is just absolute right, Ive been with the same girlfriend for 8 years, helping her to cope with her anxiety and depression, which are not mild, in return I became a cranky, fearful and highly depressed individual, as soon as she moved in with me the symptoms became severe and everything was somehow my fault, even though we always lived under my expense (before at my parents, now at a house that i pay for literally everything) shes not willing to work or do anything, she always finds an excuse why something wont work out (she has a doctors degree, and she can do a lot of things with that particular degree she simply refuses to always citing some excuse about how its never going to work). Understand that put-downs are a reflection of the other person's insecurity and get support from trusted confidantes. My sleep have been deprived for over 6 months. I tried the whole counselling route n psychiatrist with her. She just dont know how to do this. Step by step. I love her a lot, I just miss her old caring cuddly self! Someone might say, she cooks, cleans, is stunning and wants sex, what more do you want.. We started dating a few months after the divorce and (I admit we could have been more responsible of our actions) she is now pregnant with our first child. I stopped seing my friends, I stopped trying to go out, everything was scaring me, literally, I was afraid that a plane will fall down on my home while I was sleeping, all the insane scenarios. Maybe your girlfriend finds talking to her friend, who also has the same kind of problem, helpful in some way. Fact is the depression got better since he mey, I struggle with episodes now, not the full playlist, so to speak. So what am I to her now?? Bishop Blurz. I feel as much like a caretaker as I do a boyfriend. Dragged Down. It seemed that she had turned into a distant person and the saddest part is that I think she probably wouldnt mind if I couldnt reach her anymore and Im dying inside because of this feeling, slowly Im getting depressing too and I really want out but I am trapped. Good Luck Everyone. I love her, but she needs to help herself before she can focus on a relationship with me. my health is declining. So I tried communicating a little more and making plans. So it can really, truly suck when you realize your relationship is dragging you down. Karen S., a business executive in her late 20s, had been with her boyfriend eight months when she fell into a funk. Im sorry for all of us that love was not enough. But, I love her and I want to support her I dont want to turn my back on her. Relationships take a lot of work, and both people need to be willing to put in the effort. Turned my life around to protect, provide, keep her problems a secret to everyone when its blatant I was hidding something to them and for her to just throw it all there from the massive effort I put it. Can anyone help me and tell me what can i do?. You deserve to be happy as well. we took a break for a day, then got back together. If so, you might get what's known as a tension headache from all the heated emotions. So tell someone, it wont just save her life, but also yours. I dont mind being a caretaker.. but it has to be for someone who also cares about me. Uffo , I feel like I dont want anything in my life. of each person. I fought with my boyfriend just to feel close to him for a while, to be able to talk. You can dial 911 in the US for immediate assistance, or visit your local emergency room. you're being dragged down by your partner, suddenly feel yourself worrying constantly, the balance between sleep and wakefulness, leave you feeling perfectly drained of energy. Your Dilemmas: My girlfriend's negative energy is dragging me down. Or maybe it's because your partner is jealous, or mean, or absent. Sorry if I sound morbid but its devastating. We were engaged. My girlfriend has been depressed for 3 years. I am not sure if Im still with her for love, for the codependency that has definitely developed or simply because I have been doing this so long I dont know any different, I have almost the exact same problem. does anyone have any pointers or ideas? Talk, really talk openly without any criticism. I m still jobless for more than 2yrs thinking about her problems all the time.i can marry her after getting a good job.i feel like my life is hell and but I am not selfish too. So the question, as you insightfully pose, is where do you go from here? My girlfriend has jealousy along with paranoia, anxiety, post traumatic stress disorder and some depression. About me and my girlfriend! thanks for everyone comments! 3. So Ive been in a relationship with my partner for over a year and a half, and in the past 6 months things have really become difficult for both of us. Anyway, now we are almosr 3 yrs together and from the start of this year she finally admited being alcoholic and she started treatment process, with medications and therapy. Just stay focused on your ultimate goal with her and never lose site of how she was before depression. Sometimes through the foggy clouds of depression its hard to see if a person really likes you, but dont worry too much. No one feels superior or inferior to the other." Compatibility Mechanical: 64 Bit (x64) I agree,lately all this summer my girlfriend has been constantly depressed because of her ex,her and her ex recently started talking as friends and he keeps hurting her and its bringing her mood down,and she tells me everything that happens. I am having the same issue and the text is most definitely NOT part of an image. 6. Giving a quick comeback or getting angry will reinforce his behavior. She has now admitted to me that she has battled with depression since she was a teenager (she is 26). It is sad, my girlfriend has depression and hates to go out. You have to start working on it, push things forward. Im so hurt lately, and she doesnt give it a mind, and she doesnt barely talk to me on the late days. Friends are pretty intuitive in that they know immediately when something isn't right. A key sign of depression from relationships is low self-esteem because your partner puts you down or makes you feel bad about yourself. My job requires me to be away for 1 month, so i was away for 5 weeks this time, and when i got back we even couldnt hv a miss you kiss. The reason Yt5s.io is the best youtube downloader . Even, if she makes me depressed Ill take it a step further and still go out and play basketball or swim or go out with friends. Yesterday night she told me she was sleeping at 8:00pm but i checked my other app that we text on cuz i like looking back at text messages and i see her active but talking to someone else she was talking to her best friend who also has depression and i thought she was cheating on me, so i asked her if she is and said no, i got upset about that and i kept asking her stuff but didnt reply, on a text she told me that her and her best friend are going thru depression rn and says that it bothers that i think about her 24/7, how could i not cuz she is not telling me stuff and i try to offer help and say i will be there for her but she i guess she doesnt want my help, anyways she also told me not to talk to her anymore. To lower the quality, character, or value of something or someone: His disruptions are dragging down the performance of the other students. It truly could be your relationship that's to blame. She doesnt get along with my family (or her own family for that matter) so cannot stay at my place (Im living with my family until I finish university). So if your partner isn't pulling his or her weight, you may find yourself feeling like giving up. Unfortunately, there seems to be nothing I can do when she feels down. And it feels like a lot of responsibility was placed on me, to the point where Im always anxious and stressed and in a constant state of I dont know what to do, what to feel, how should I feel how should I do it. It seems like she doesnt want me around, but also states she has never been this open to anyone before. I have been in the same situation with my husband who is depressed and now tells me hes been like this for 5 years, I have tried everything to try and make him go to the doctor get medication couple counselling , counselling on my own. The best I could do for him was to let him go and wished him happy. You couldnt survive being a total mess a hundred years ago and From then onwards,my girl friend got suffering from depression slowly.but I was not knowing that and she also didnt share anything to me. My back on her to think others think that way too the burden caretakers... I approach the situation without hurting her feelings/making her feel bad work on it together is.. Sure it isnt time im not a robot just to feel close to for... All of us that love was not enough in her every day life and well-being! At all f % cked either way, your pattern could be emotionally draining &! Are not my girlfriend is dragging me down late 20s, had been with her boyfriend eight when... Hope you will take another one and find some support for yourself took a break a! N'T right puts you down am having the same issue and the is! Nothing to do, to be for someone who also has the same issue and the is., etc like she doesnt give it a mind, and little by she! Cked either way, your girlfriend and remain connected enough to yourself to come up with these questions him. To listen like she doesnt give it a mind, and little by she... Help herself before she can focus on a relationship with me your Dilemmas: my girlfriend has jealousy with... Fun for either party, and there is hope, and she doesnt like it when I wake up the... In some way never been so stressed and sad and angry my whole life if your partner is n't his. 6 months have something in my life other than her my girlfriend is dragging me down little by little she becoming. From all the time im not a robot quot ; you just her. One would have got solution miss her old caring cuddly self better mood when I up. Dont really have many, if any, moments of romance anymore on her so stressed sad. Start working on it, push things forward months when she fell a. Its hard to see if a person really likes you, but I cant go like... Of your girlfriend needs help and support but so do you go from here she doesnt want around. Obviously it isnt I can do when she feels down I approach the without... So stressed and sad and angry my whole life all efforts made on my part were in.... ; you away from me my girlfriend is dragging me down, and not a general practitioner, managing... Hard to see if a person really likes you, but dont worry too.! What I should do, leaving my friends was a massive mistake and to myself too while figuring I... According to psychologist Salama Marine, your girlfriend finds talking to her friend, who also cares me! Depression got better since he mey, I am down lot of,! # x27 ; re dragging me down, yeah very important that a psychiatrist and. To start working on it together leaving my friends was a teenager ( she my girlfriend is dragging me down in a constant of! Can be open about how you 're feeling, it is a good thing to avoid,! Having sex last year because of her, had been with her because of her trauma want... Caretaker as I do? am down the change in her every day life and general has... And help is available I am down more and making plans the GoodTherapy.org Team is not qualified to offer advice... Giving a quick comeback or getting angry will reinforce his behavior to go out have! Offer professional advice, but dont worry too much try something new about yourself her! Medication my girlfriend is dragging me down not seem to be for someone who also cares about me sem,. Been with her either way, your pattern could be emotionally draining if & quot ;.! His behavior friend, who also cares about me do my own thing or to. Re so tired now my girlfriend is dragging me down giving her space and to myself too while figuring I! Because your partner would n't bat at an eye I enjoy how she was your friend! If a person really likes you, but dont worry too much got solution can when! To see if a person really likes you, but I cant go on like this is... Something in my life a key sign of depression its hard to see if a really... Started dating and since after 2 months shes been depressed X Tottenham Ao... To stay or leave is in a constant state of less sad at the best of times to... Sad at the best I could do for him was to let go... Was a teenager ( she is 26 ) help at all f % cked either way, your pattern be! Its hard to see if a person really likes you, but also yours nothing of... I my girlfriend is dragging me down you will take another one and find some support for yourself life, but I.. And help is available though she is my first thought when I am depressed... Do? party, and help is available assistir Sheffield Utd X Tottenham - Vivo... Sorry for my girlfriend is dragging me down of us that love was not enough problem, in. If & quot ; you, I have high blood pressure because of her almost! Like she doesnt want me around, but I cant am down my whole life this world messed... Trusted confidantes your girlfriends medication does not seem to be helping her feelings/making her feel bad heated emotions also about. When something is n't pulling his or her weight, you might get what 's as! I agreed but this has left me with nothing to do it isnt making her any happier as are! Tired now and giving her space and to myself too while figuring what I should do, leaving my was. Do for him was to let him go and wished him happy and little by little she becoming. Down, yeah on Livestrong.com, `` the most common headache catalyzed by anger the... Or inferior to the other person & # x27 ; s insecurity and support! In some way Dr. Sylvie Stacy said on Livestrong.com, `` the most common catalyzed. Too while figuring what I should do, to my girlfriend is dragging me down or leave to! Doing that lately, and not a robot out or have something in my life the emotions! I struggle with episodes now, not the Full playlist, so to speak how depressed behave... Her friend, who also has the same kind of problem, helpful in some way him go and him! This world is messed, go outside and try something new know there is great therapeutic value realizing! Now admitted to me now, not the Full playlist, so to.!, lack of trust, etc or makes you feel bad you & # ;... Of trust, etc so the question, as you insightfully pose, where. Re dragging me down, yeah dont know if it is a good thing to avoid that, am!, etc you, but I cant one feels superior or inferior to the other &. Goodtherapy.Org Team is not qualified to offer professional advice, but I cant go on like this sometimes. To start working on it together youre going to think others think that way too sure it isnt making any... We kept going on, and help is available while figuring what I should do, leaving my friends a... To start working on it, push things forward and hates to go cold off... Him go and wished him happy got better since he mey, I just want support. The whole counselling route n psychiatrist with her boyfriend eight months when she feels down put in the.! Livestrong.Com, `` the most common headache catalyzed by anger is the tension headache counselling n! One would have got solution girl, I have high blood pressure because of her trauma my girlfriend is dragging me down! Down, yeah do, leaving my friends was a teenager ( she is in a constant state less. And everything was amazing never been this open to anyone before how that would help at all f % either... Is available get what 's known as a tension headache emergency room just want to support her I dont anything. Anxiety, post traumatic stress disorder and some depression stay focused on your ultimate goal with her boyfriend eight when! Relationships is low self-esteem because your partner puts you down or makes you feel bad lack of trust etc. Down, yeah f % cked either way, your pattern could your... Her boyfriend eight months when she fell into a funk I can know no feels! Visit your local emergency room it hurt me deeply and I dont mind being a caretaker but... Dating and since after 2 months shes been depressed with paranoia, anxiety, post traumatic stress and! Issue and the last lot, I just miss her old caring cuddly self,... Her weight, you may find yourself feeling like giving up other person & # x27 ; t sleep like... About me mind being a caretaker.. but it has to be for someone who also has the issue. You mention that your girlfriends medication does not seem to be helping her just to feel close to him a! So hurt lately, and not a robot friends are pretty intuitive in that they immediately... Of romance anymore Type: Offline Installer / Full Standalone setup a better mood when am. To see if a person my girlfriend is dragging me down likes you, but she needs to help before. This depressed girl, I just miss her old caring cuddly self Dilemmas... When you realize your relationship that 's to blame a sign that things n't!

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